Overkill
by ShIvErInG sMiLe
Summary: He's not a teenager anymore. Life is harder as the days pass and he can't help it. Prongs: for better or for worse, the moments and emotions that made his legacy an unforgivable one. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer**: I own everything because I just bought everything from JK herself. So you can start worshipping me!

**A/N:** Just something I came up with. A little songfic about James' fears and some moments. I hope you like it. The song is "Overkill" from the amazing Men at work. And remember the 2 R's: Read and review- R&R!

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**Overkill**

"My life is amazing" thought James as he watched his new born and his wife sleep.

The baby was curled up between the couple, the thumb on his mouth made him look so innocent, so fragile.

James remembered the day Harry was born. It was the first time that he realized that the most wonderful gifts in life came in small packets.

The first time he'd carried him, he was afraid to break him. He, James Potter, famous Marauder and heartbreaker, was scared of his own son.

"What if I'm a bad father? What if he hates me? What if…?"

Lily stopped him with a kiss.

"Shhh…you'll be a wonderful dad James. He'll be as proud of you as I am"

James smiled at the thought of this memory and gave another look at the tiny creature beside him.

"If only I could give you the world you deserve, Harry. But he won't let me and I can't stop him. I'm sorry son. I don't want to let you down."

_I can't get to sleep  
I think about the implications  
of diving in too deep  
And possibly the complications _

_Especially at night  
I worry over situations  
I know will be alright  
Perhaps it's just my imagination _

The first time they fought him was difficult. The second time, they barely made it alive.

"I can't believe it! I just can't believe it!"

James wasn't smiling playfully as usually. He was throwing vases to the floor and glaring angrily at no one in particular. His voice was a mix of rage and frustration. His handsome face had several cuts and his cloak was dirty and torn.

A read haired woman was sitting in the sofa, watching him dryly. She also had severe wounds on her leg and arm but she didn't seem to care.

"If only all those other Death Eaters hadn't appeared…You know? If he's so BLOODY powerful then, why can he fight like a real man?"

"Because he's not one, not anymore" answered the woman with a matter-a-fact tone.

The boy turned to her a bit surprised, as if he'd just noticed her sitting there. After he recovered from the shock, he sat next to her, a regretful look.

"I'm sorry sweetie, I didn't mean to yell" he said, holding her hands and taking her by the waist

"It's just that I wish we could finish him already. My fan club is gonna be scared of me with all the bruises in my pretty face".

Lily grinned sadly and put her hand around his neck, brushing his messy black hair with her fingers.

"Don't be disappointed. You still have me".

James kissed her forehead and whispered in her ear "And that's all I ever wanted"

_Day after day it reappears  
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear  
Ghosts appear and fade away _

_Alone between the sheets  
Only brings exasperation  
It's time to walk the streets  
Smell the desperation _

"I told her not to eat Sirius' cake dough but she wouldn't listen to me doctor"

"I don't think this is a simple stomach issue James"

The couple exchanged worried glances.

"What is it then Doctor?"

The doctor laughed but neither of them seemed to understand.

"You're gonna be parents. Another Potter is arriving!"

Lily started laughing hysterically and jumping on her sit screaming

"Oh My God! Oh My God!"

But James didn't say anything. He sat there with a blank look and just staring to a point in the corner of the office.

"Did you hear that James? We're having a ba…James? Are you okay?"

"Uhum"

He looked like he was about to return his breakfast.

Lily was a bit disappointed at the lack of expression of his husband but the doctor calmed her down

"It will sink in, give it time"

She grinned sheepishly and left the place next to a numb James.

"Good night…James? James, are you listening to me?"

Something in the guy's head must had clicked in that moment because he scared the hell of the red haired lying next to him when he kissed her passionately and out of the blue and with a broad smile screamed

"We're going to have a baby!"

Lily started laughing and patted him on the head

"Dork!"

He kissed her again until they were out of oxygen.

"He's gonna be the best Quidditch player ever!"

"Poor baby! You're not born yet and your crazy dad is already thinking about playing Quidditch with you!" talking to her still flat stomach

"Don't listen to her boy! You'll have the coolest broom between your friends"

"And why are you so sure he's a boy? It could be a girl, you know?"

"Wanna bet?"

_At least there're pretty lights  
And though there's little variation  
It nullifies the night  
From overkill _

_Day after day it reappears  
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear  
Ghosts appear and fade away _

"You won't stop me; none of you is good enough. I'm the most powerful wizard that the world has ever met. "

"I'm the one whose name everybody fears. I'm the one with no boundaries or rules to control me."

"I'm your deepest fear; I'm your worst nightmare. I'm the one that makes you shiver at night; I'm the monster in your closet."

"No one is a threat to me because I'm beyond human, I'm beyond mortal, and I'm beyond life itself. I'm the most perfect being, the one you can't restrain. I'm there when the blackness gets darker; I'm there when the silence is overwhelming."

"And you see your families sleeping and you cannot stop wondering, Is this the day I'll die? Because that love makes you weak, predictable and that's why you'll never beat me"

"That doesn't keep us from trying"

_I can't get to sleep  
I think about the implications  
Of diving in too deep  
And possibly the complications _

_Especially at night  
I worry over situations  
I know we'll be alright  
It's just overkill _

Harry look at the man that had awaken him. A pair of glasses was covering his hazel eyes but he knew it was daddy.

"Dada!"

He called him but the man put a big index finger on his mouth and told him

"Let's be quiet, ok boy? Let's give mummy a rest. I'm still how can she have strength to fight Voldemort but she ends up even more exhausted after playing with you at the park".

"_I don't get the jock dady, what's a Volemon? Does it taste like peas cause I don't like those, ew!" _thought Harry.

"You're such a big boy, son. Very soon, we'll be playing Quidditch along uncle Sirius. Do you like him Harry? He is your godfather and he is my best friend too, you know? I hope one day you find friends as good as the ones I have." A sad look crossed James face.

"_Don't be sad dad, I like your friends. Especially the crazy one who promised to buy me a broom as soon as I learn to stand. He told me not to tell mummy though. _

_Daddy, not so hard! I like when you hug me but I think I heard something breaking!"_

James let go of his son as if he had just heard what he'd said. The boy noticed that he had water running down his cheek. His dad looked sad; he hadn't seemed him so sad before.

"I'm sorry son. It's just that sometimes, I want to hold you and your mom so hard and never let go, I don't want to lose you, ever! I won't let him take you away; you're most precious thing I own!"

Harry watched surprised at his dad. He'd never seen him like that, scared and tearful. He thought he should comfort him but he couldn't speak, the words were useless. So he went up and hugged him. James was shocked but when he realized what the little boy had just done, he hugged him too and with a grin he told him

"I love you Harry. Your mom and I, we'll always love you no matter what. I can't promise you a better world, but I can promise to try my best"

_Day after day it reappears  
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear  
Ghosts appear and fade away_


End file.
